A Variety of Ponderings

These are just a gathering of miscellaneous thoughts/prayers/insights I have had the past couple of months. Hope they are helpful in some way to you; if not, then just enjoy the read J Have a great week, everybody!

·         Audrey Hepburn

o   A biography written by her son, Sean Ferrer, has sat on my grandmother’s coffee table for many years. Over that span of time, I have glanced at the pictures of the woman whose legacy still graces all of our hearts in some way, but never actually read the book. A few weeks ago, I finally decided to read it. After doing so, I feel as though I am somehow connected to this incredible woman. Something Sean notes about her was her beautiful sadness. Hepburn had a very hard childhood, what with living during the Great Depression and dealing with the psychological hurting of a father who left when she needed him the most. But she did not let that sadness define her. Yes, it was a part of her, but it did not control her future. Though her “humility” may not be the perfect model of what Jesus would want us to be, but there are still many things about her nature we could benefit from, including her sincerity and genuine love for other people.

 “’Take good care of your clothes,’ she would say, ‘because they are the first impression of you.’ So when she appeared, her clothes didn’t’ scream out, ‘Look at me!’ but, ‘This is me…no better than you.’ And she truly believed in that. She didn’t see herself as anything special or unusual, which is why she worked so hard and was always pleasant and professional. Her style was only an extension of who she was, the person we all admired, because don deep we knew that what we saw was not just clever packaging but an honest and 100 percent genuine human being.”

·         Lace: The Weakness of Man

 

 

o   Sitting on our beautiful rug in our room, my roommate and I are painting quotes on burlap canvases for our wall. Decorating the canvas with lace, I began twirling the fabric between my fingers and rolling them, making into little flowers. As I was taking these scraps of lace, trying to mold them into the shape I wanted, the lace began to unravel and pull apart with ease. At first I was frustrated, but then as I continued to cooperate with the lace, it began to look more and more like the flower I wanted. And in its own crafty, homemade sort of way, it was beautiful.

 Then I thought of man. I thought of myself.

 We are lace. With the slightest pull or tug of our circumstances, we unravel. We fall apart. Sometimes we see ourselves as mere scraps, worn and torn from the madness of the world. We think, “who could ever love someone as feeble as me? Someone so worthless, so broken.” But then came Jesus. Someone who could glue our hearts back together, perfectly complete and blameless thanks to His gift of righteousness. His blood was the glue, His resurrection the confirmation of the project. But He’s not done with us yet. There is still more molding to be done, more creations to be formed. But yes, one day we will be complete. We will cease to unravel in chaos and confusion and maintain our beauty in the security of Christ. . “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Phil. 1:6).

·         Sunrise: The Faithfulness of God

 

 

o   It was around 7:30am Monday morning. Probably about 40°F. The time, the temperature, and the day of the week itself had potential to put me in a bad mood. However, the Lord was gracious and gave me a willing spirit, ready to start the day and see what He had in store.

 As I was walking along the path, constantly adjusting my sleeves to better cover my hands, I looked to my left. There, just like there is every day, was the sunrise. I couldn’t help but thank God for the blessing on a cold Monday morning. He is faithful.

 Even though governments are screwed up and have potential (they don’t always, mind you) to lead us astray, God is faithful. Even when I spend more time on my phone than I do talking with God, He is still faithful. Even though the world is full of sexual impurity, violence, human trafficking, slavery, thievery, resentment, bitterness, and hatred, God is still faithful. And He still provides a sunrise every morning. And even if I can’t see the sunrise here in the US, somewhere else in another part of the world, a person is seeing the sunrise God still decided to give. He still provides little blessings throughout the day like mac-n-cheese, good auditions, and crafting with roommates just to remind you how faithful He really is.

·         Pride: What We Were Not Created For

o   There’s more I could say about this that I’ve learned, but frankly I don’t know if I could emotionally do that at the moment. But remember, you were not created for pride. That’s why it is so destructive, is because it was never meant to be a part of your identity. We were not created to be worshipped…we were created to worship the One who deserves it.

·         The Practicality of Scripture

o   More to come on this in another post!

·         The Car Ride: Seeing Jesus’ Face

o   There isn’t a whole lot to say on this topic except for there is everything to say, I just don’t know exactly how to say it. One Sunday on the car ride back from church, we were listening to Casting Crowns, “Glorious Day”. It’s a beautiful song that I haven’t heard in a while. As I was listening to the Gospel being put to song and listened to all the things Jesus had done for me, I just imagined His face…

 I’m sure everyone has done it. We have this idea in our minds of what He looks like as a man (which, because of our various cultures, we all probably have a false idea of what He looked like. Sorry Americans, but He wasn’t Caucasian). And I almost felt like I saw Him…I pictured what His smile might have looked like, His beard, His eyes, etc.

And…it kind of blew my mind. To think that Jesus really was a man. A man I could easily bump into in a grocery store or pass by on a street. Oh how much I wanted Him to really be there, standing on the side of the road as we drove back to campus, beckoning me to come to Him with His arms open wide.

I would’ve cried “Jesus!!!” Bolted out of the back seat (who cares how fast the car was going?), sprinted to Him and met Him the fields I have passed by oh so many times. Our embrace would have been like none other I have ever had in my life. I’m a huge hugger; there’s few things I love more. Can you imagine how awesome of a hugger Jesus must be? He is the King of compassion, He is love, He is the ultimate healer…there is no one better. Our hug would be out of this world.

 I imagine I would cry…or just be in so much shock that I literally had no words. I’m sure He would hold my face in His hands - gosh I want to cry just thinking about that – and say some words of love. “My beloved…My child”.

 There’s an old song that came out when I was a little kid, and I can’t help but think of it now. Oh Jesus, please come back. Come back soon. So that you can display Your power for all the world to see, hold our face in your hands so You can tell us, “It really is all going to be alright. You are mine. Don’t be afraid.”

 I can only imagine
What it will be like
When I walk
By your side

I can only imagine
What my eyes will see
When your face
Is before me
I can only imagine

[Chorus:]
Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all
I can only imagine

I can only imagine
When that day comes
And I find myself
Standing in the Son

I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever
Forever worship You
I can only imagine

·         The Chief End of Man:

o   We’ve all heard it: to glorify God and enjoy Him forever. Sometimes I forget that this chief end of my life is not just for the end of my life…it is for the beginning and middle of it. Yes, my joy in Christ will be made complete when I am finally with Him face to face (MAN does that get me pumped up right now!), but I am to enjoy Him right now. Jesus is not just for dying…He is for living.

·         A Prayer: I’ve never done this on a blog before just because it’s such a personal thing, but maybe it will encourage other girls to do the same in the privacy of their thoughts. A few years back, I started praying and writing notes to my future husbands. While it might sound a little strange, it’s actually very rewarding to think that God is taking care of your future husband’s heart just as He is taking care of yours, and the idea that you can take part in that process right now is super cool. This semester, my mind has been consumed in thinking about relationships, dating, marriage, etc. So, instead of letting my mind wander (maybe to places I shouldn’t), I’m going to pray for my future husband. As you will see in the prayer below, these prayers don’t have to be eloquent masterpieces; what matters is your heart. And how awesome will it be when you are married and you can you’re your husband, “I’ve been praying for your heart for years.” Single ladies! *insert song here* Try it! You might be surprised of what God will do with it.

 

Heavenly Father,

            I thank You for Your unconditional love for me. I pray that my future husband would be a picture of that for me and our family. I pray that You would take care of his heart – heal wounds he may be enduring and give him peace and joy. Lord, I want to meet him so badly. I want to meet the person that I am going to spend the rest of my life with, but help me to never forget my first Love. Help me to never forget You. We are only able to love because You have first loved us…never let us forget that. Lord, I pray for my future husband’s spiritual walk. I pray that he is madly in love with You, studying Your Word, and serving Your kingdom. Go ahead and start preparing his heart for our marriage and our family. Let us both be incredibly in love with You before we fall in love with each other. It’s insane knowing that my future husband is around somewhere, doing something, being somebody, and yet I have no idea who he is. But You know everything. You know every step we will make before we take it. You know the number of hairs on our head and You know that we will be together someday. I seriously love You…help me to love You more so that I can in return love my husband in a way that is a picture of Your love.

                                                                                                            In Jesus’ precious name,

                                                                                                                                    Amen.

·         The Importance of Understanding Spiritual Warfare

o   Dig into this subject! I was listening to an audio of this awesome guy named Colin Harbinson, and he shed a lot of light onto this topic that I, honestly, haven’t done a lot of research on. Look at places like Ephesians and Revelation for more insight. Coming up I might make a post on what I learned from Harbinson and in my own personal study.

·         The Power of the Written Word and the Power of Song:

o   I’ve never been so overwhelmed with this feeling than I have this semester…and it’s been awesome. The fact that our hearts and spirits can be so intertwined to the point where our redemptive acts of creation through our artistic abilities can touch our very souls, maybe even making that touch bubble up to our eyes and tears spilling out…what is more beautiful than that? That all truth is God’s truth, whether it’s found in a Mumford lyric, a ukulele chord, or a poem that you’re hearing for the first time.

 

So that’s the end of my ranting for now. Congrats, college kids, on finishing up finals! If you haven’t taken them yet (like me), then hang in there! Go have an awesome Christmas and New Year’s!